Adoptive Family FAQ's
Who are the children waiting for adoption?
At any given time over 100,000 children in the U.S are available for adoption. In South Carolina, over 1600 children are waiting for permanent adoptive homes. Most have come from backgrounds of abuse or neglect, and many have lived in the foster care system for several years. Many have emotional, physical, or learning difficulties. Some are brothers and sisters who need to stay together. Many are African American, and many are school age. They are all waiting for the love and security that only a permanent family can offer.
For families with an interest in International Adoption, there are literally millions of children in need of homes. Some are true orphans, meaning both parents are deceased but most are social orphans. Most children are available for adoption due to severe poverty. As poverty increases so does the chances of abuse and neglect. Most countries that place children for international adoption have no foster care system and children removed from their homes are placed into orphanages. Other children may have medical needs that parents are unable to provide care for and their only option is to place a child in an orphanage. “Orphanages regardless of quality of care are not good places for children” and most struggle to meet children’s basic needs. The future of a child who resides in an orphanage is very bleak, and adopting a child from an orphanage can literally save the life of a child.
What if I want to adopt an infant?
Infant or toddler adoption can be explored through agency adoption (both DSS and private), independent adoption through an attorney, and intercountry adoption. Many infant adoptions are now "open adoptions", and involve direct contact between the adopting family and the birth parents placing the child for adoption. A family can contact a number of agencies to learn about their procedures for approving families for adoption. All families will need to complete the "home study" process to be eligible to adopt. For more information on Certified Investigators who provide adoption home studies in South Carolina contact the Department of Social Services.
How long will it take to adopt?
The home study process usually includes a home visit, a time for self-reflection and pre-adoption education. Most home studies are completed in less than 6 months. Average adoptions can be completed in 12-24 months. However, each case is different and the actual time to adopt varies with the type of adoption, the child being adopted, legal risk, and the agency. Please consult with your agency for a more definite time frame.
What will it cost to adopt?
Children may be adopted through the Department of Social Services in South Carolina at little to no costs. Costs of adopting a healthy infant in the United States through a private adoption agency may average between $10,000 to $30,000. Independent adoption costs vary from case to case. International adoptions are more costly. International adoptions are more costly. An international adoption averages between $18,000 and $45,000 in fees and travel expenses while in the foreign country. This will vary greatly by country.
I do not make a lot of money. Is financial assistance available?
Most children registered with the State and eligible for adoption through the Department of Social Services as having special needs have been already classified as eligible for financial assistance, called Adoption Assistance or subsidy. It is important that you discuss Adoption Assistance with your social worker prior to adoption. There are also adoption tax credits, grants, loans, and employer assistance available. See our Financial Assistance page for more information.
I do not own my own home. Would I qualify to adopt?
Absolutely! Some families own their own homes, others rent, and some live with other family members.
I am not married. Could I adopt?
Of course you could qualify to adopt. DSS and many private agencies place with married or single people.
What if the child's birthparents want to take custody back after the adoption?
Before a child can be in an adoptive placement, parents must voluntarily relinquish their rights or the rights of the parents must be terminated by the court (TPR).
Can I be a foster parent first or instead of adopting?
Yes, agencies need foster homes as well as adoptive homes. Foster parents also have the opportunity to adopt should the child become available. For more information on becoming a foster parent, contact the Department of Social Services.
Birth Mother FAQ's
This text was written/provided by James Fletcher Thompson, LLC Attorney at Law, and can not be reproduced without express permission of the Author.
Is adoption really the right decision for me?
If you are unable to provide the care that your child needs at this time in your life, adoption is a loving choice. It is not an easy decision, but it is a responsible and courageous act of love.
What will my child think of me?
Adoptive families come from all walks of life but they have several things in common: our adoptive parents admire your strength and courage. This child will know that an adoption plan is not made because of a lack of love, but instead because you love this child so much you want him or her to have all of life’s blessings and opportunities. Adoptive parents’ love and respect for you will be passed on from them to the child.
What about my medical costs and other expenses?
The South Carolina Law allows adoptive parents to be responsible for the medical care as well as other reasonable living expenses. There is no cost to you.
How do I know the adoptive couple are good people and what can I know about them?
Families are thoroughly screened and their backgrounds verified by a certified adoption investigator. Their confidentiality is protected as is yours. However, you can be given general information such as their religious preference, whether they have any other children, in what state they live, and if you desire, may arrange a meeting between you and the adoptive couple.
Do I have to go to court?
No, not usually. A mother may go to court is if the adoptive parents live out of state.
What if I find a family to adopt my child?
Birth mothers sometimes locate adoptive couples through their family and friends. This is called identified adoption. The prospective adoptive parents may contact us. The agency/attorney would be available to assist you and the adoptive parents.
Can the father of the baby be involved in the adoption process?
Yes. The father is encouraged to be involved, if he desires. He can help you to select the prospective adoptive couple and be supportive of you during this time. He can also provide a medical history which would be helpful in the years to come to the child.
How do I choose a family?
The attorney/agency usually has family profiles for you to review.
If I am under the age of 18, do my parents have to sign papers in order for me to place my child for adoption? No
Do I have to involve the birth father?
As much information as possible is needed about the birth father. However, there are times when a birth father is not supportive of a birth mother. If the birth father has not lived with the birth mother for six months continuously prior to the birth of the child, or if he has failed to contribute financially, then the birth father’s consent is not required to the adoption. Therefore, if the birth father has not lived with you or been financially supportive of you, you are free to make an adoption plan without his consent. If you are married to the birth father the rules are different.
When can I sign the adoption papers?
A consent/relinquishment for adoption cannot be signed by the birth mother or birth father until the baby is born. Usually the papers are signed by you before you leave the hospital.
May I receive counseling?
Some agencies/attorneys have adoption counselors on call day and night. In addition, they may arrange private counseling sessions with you before and after the placement of the child for adoption.
What is a hospital plan?
The adoption agency/attorney works with the hospitals to make sure you have the best care available. You have choices in the hospital such as: keeping the baby in the nursery or in your room; being placed in another, more quite area of the hospital; deciding whether to see the baby; deciding who to have with you in labor and delivery; deciding when to sign the consent/ relinquishment for adoption; deciding if you are going to allow visitors or calls; using a different name to protect your confidentiality.
After I sign adoption papers in the hospital, how soon is the baby placed with the adoptive couple?
The baby is placed with the adoptive family as soon as the baby is discharged from the hospital and after adoption papers have been signed.
May I write the baby a letter so that he will know why I chose adoption?
Yes, you are encouraged to put your thoughts and feelings in a letter to the baby. Usually the adoptive couple puts the letter in a safe place to give to the child when he is old enough to understand. You may also send photos of yourself, the birth father and your family. This letter will be a treasured keepsake of the child in the years to come.
What does the adoption agency/attorney expect of me?
Please be honest with us, regularly attend prenatal appointments, provide confidential background information, keep in regular contact with us, and take good care of yourself.
What if the child wants to contact me later in life?
If you desire to be reunited later in life, you will sign a statement agreeing to be contacted if the child desires to contact you. This statement will be part of your permanent file. You will need to keep a current address with the agency/attorney office so they can locate you.
What do I need to do to get started?
Call us or email ACES or one of the adoption agencies or attorneys on our Resources page. Any of us will be glad to talk to you.
